Alright, I’ve Fooled around Long Enough.

I told you about my New Years plans (I still refuse to call them resolutions), but not a lot of concrete change has happened. I know what you’re thinking: “Whaaaaaat? That NEVER happens with resolutions New Years plans!” and “But you’re so organized and self-controlled!” and “You always seem like you have it so together, though!”

Yes. All of this. BUT actually none of it.

I am failing, you guys. I’m tired of failing too. I am too competitive and too prefectionist of a person to put up with this crap. And by this crap, I mean my 20’s so far. When did I get so lazy? With my diet, with my household stuff, with just all of it.

The other morning I woke up early for some reason, and I always wish for that because that’s usually when I have the “want to” to get stuff done, but this morning (much like most times like this), the one where I actually woke up at 6:30 without my alarm clock, it was like “woe is me, booooo.” I kid you not: I started praying that God would give me the motivation to get up and be productive before work. As soon as I started, God was all: “You have got to be kidding me. You’re seriously praying that I will help you TO GET OUT OF BED.” That may seem harsh, but I make a practice of praying that God will give me the motivation to complete simple tasks that are so not a big deal and will take like 5 seconds. I have got to realize that grown-ups shouldn’t act like this and it’s time to pay the Piper and own up to my responsibilities.

This is such a balancing act for me. I feel like I’m either lazy as all get-out, or I’m super uptight perfectionist crazy girl. I need to find the healthy in-between of letting go and finding joy in spontaneity sometimes, and NOT GETTING THE HECK OUT OF BED.

So I have developed a highly skilled, technical (<– not that) plan for getting myself out of this rut:

For my diet: I’ve realized that saying “I’m going to eat healthy!” is not cutting it. I need a specific, guideline-filled plan for myself to succeed, so I made one. While we are at home, we are eating recipes and dishes that consist of only the following (and you may notice that it is reminiscent of the Food chapter in 7: An Experimental Mutiny on Excess, and that’s because we lost weight while doing it. Simple as that.):

  • two meat types: chicken and fish
  • all produce: fruits and veggies
  • one carb: Brown Rice
  • one dairy source: plain, nonfat Greek yogurt
  • eggs
  • seasonings: any dry seasoning (excluding sugars), olive oil, honey/agave nectar
  • drinks: water and coffee (Almond milk and sugar may be used in coffee only)

So this is the plan. I feel it is fool-proof because we are allowing ourselves to cheat when we eat out, although we are planning to try and eat better at those times too! You guys, yesterday, I ate at Mexican restaurant (<– my kryptonite) and ate fajitas sans cheese, sour cream, or tortillas. I EVEN SKIPPED THE QUESO! I am superwoman right now.

Look at that grocery supply! I am so proud of myself! The only boxed items are the rice and flavor packets for my water!

Look at that grocery supply! I am so proud of myself! The only boxed items are the rice, salad dressing, and flavor packets for my water!

For day-to-day crap: I am planning to try and rebel against myself in the will-power deficient times. I’m stubborn enough that I am determined to make a habit out of doing what needs to be done instead of being lazy. It supposedly takes 21 days to make or break a habit, so what if I made it a habit to get up earlier, to get out of the shower quicker, to finish one of the million project I’ve started, to get my laundry folded on the time-table of a sane person?

I’ve got to pull myself together. I’m over having breakdowns every couple of months because I feel so out of balance and ungrounded and out of control. Surely I am not the only one. I struggle with looking at other women who seem to have it all together and are able to juggle the thousands of hats they have to wear AND THEY HAVE KIDS! Oh my gosh what will I do when I have kids if I can’t even keep it together now?

What do you guys do? What are your plans for keeping yourselves sane? How do you overcome the lazies?

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