The Adoption Thing

So we broke the news to social media land last September that we are looking to rapidly expand our family. I wrote that we were opening up our home to adoption and foster care and that we were seeking two specific kids. I realize that it’s been way too long since I’ve given an update, and those of you that know me IRL have been asking about it and giving us so much support. We are so thankful!

adoption kids

I thought I’d give an update for those that aren’t in the know.

To start with, our home was opened (yaaaay!)! It took much longer than we had anticipated, but I think God knew what He was doing because this hormone-crazed mama would so not have been able to handle it. The second piece of news is not so great. We did not get those two kids. It is ultimately, probably, a blessing. It was decide that their current housing situation would become more permanent, and even though it is sad for us, stability is so great for waiting children.

Our reactions to this news were much different than we expected. I think somehow I saw the writing on the wall and subconsciously prepared myself. Bryan, on the other hand, was pretty heartbroken. Where I was ready to move on pretty quickly (part of which was probably a coping mechanism), Bryan was wanting to take a break and mourn a little longer. I think it was better that way. Even though it was so, so sad, seeing Bryan grieve the loss of kids he never knew reminded me that he is in this and wanting to love children that need it. It’s good to be shown that he’s not just ok with this plan of mine, but that it’s his plan too.

Our original intentions for this were to be a concurrent-planning foster care home, meaning that our home was open to foster kids, but that we are ready and willing to adopt if that became the plan for the child(ren). After these events and my not-so-speedy emotional recovery from having a baby pulled out of me, we decided to be adopt-only for a while, meaning that children who come into our home will already be terminated from their birth parents and on the road to a forever family.

Since all of these events, we have had a couple of calls about kids, and a disclosure meeting about one. We decided that that particular situation was not best for our home right now, and thus are still a 3-person-2-dog family. We have inquiries out on a few kids, however, and we continue to pray about them and hope for the best.

Oh! And we’re buying a house! It happened very quickly, and we move in 3 weeks, which is why I have been more MIA on the blogging. This type-A lady is trying her best to not get overwhelmed and stay organized as I pack and purge and plan (alliteration only somewhat intended).

AAAAAAAHHH wish us luck!

Love, Alex

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Surviving.

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Ok. I feel like maybe I am finally in a place to gather my feelings and share them without crying, saying something stupid, or yelling at my husband for zero reason at all. (Whatever. How DARE he put his jeans in the wrong laundry bag.)

The aftermath of having a baby sucks. Hard. I’m over it.

No one tells you that 3 months later your clothes still won’t fit, your marriage will be really really hard for a while, you will cry more than you’ve eve cried in your life, and that you will feel such bipolar emotions, at the same time, all day every day.

Oh my gosh this baby is the best thing to ever happen to me.”

“Oh my gosh my life is over!”

All of this is worth it for this precious baby boy.”

“I may never seep again!”

I’ve never ugly-cried to my husband so much in the history of the world. I’ve caught myself thinking back to when I just wanted so badly to impress this guy. After what he has seen of me, let’s hope that good impression has lasted him through.

Oh my what his eyes had just seen. (Sorry it's blurry, I obvi wasn't the picture-taker.)

Oh my what his eyes had just seen. (Sorry it’s blurry, I obvi wasn’t the picture-taker.)

I wish someone would have told me that I would only want to watch Psych because I couldn’t watch anything that made me feel things. Or that I would find myself saying “I’m sad today.” because there was just no other way to describe how I felt. I wish someone would have told me (and Bryan) that it would be a while before our needs would be met fully by each other. Most of all, I wish someone would have told me how long it would take to start feeling better.

It’s not that I expected to feel great immediately, but my for-real expectation was like two weeks to a month.

Lol no. Grady is 3 months old today and I am just now feeling like my head is above water. It’s all about survival. And the worst part is that next week will feel entirely different and I’ll probably come crashing down again. I can only hope that the memories of the good days will hold me through the bad ones. 

Three months later, I’ve graduated to reruns of Gilmore Girls. Maybe next week I’ll be ready for crime shows again. I also started triathlon training again. Nothing like having to get new workout clothes because my regular ones are too small. #Irony.

**Side Note: My family is doing a biggest loser competition! We are all going to beach in August, so we have until August 1st to lose the biggest percentile of our goal, lest we lose $50 instead. Cameron (my brother) doesn’t get to play and therefore is our moderator and if he is upset about it then he can just TAKE HIS SKINNINESS AND CRY HIMSELF A RIVER.**

Oh! And I made myself a chore chart because the house was driving my crazy. Plus organization and the charting of the chores was therapeutic, duh.

Isn't it pretty?

Isn’t it pretty?

So there you have it. All of my emotions and thoughts from the past 3 months word-vomited before you.

It feels good to do life again. Just don’t misplace any laundry around me and hopefully I can keep my cool a little longer.

Love, Alex

What the Proverbs 31 Woman is NOT.

Proverbs 31

You want to know a secret? I mostly HATE Christian blog posts about women. What women should be, what women should aspire to be, what kind of men women should seek, what kind of woman men should seek, and the list goes on.

I hate them. With some exceptions of course, I feel like they are sexist, narrow-minded, and generally lacking.

I’ve always held that God NEVER intended for men and women to become so unequal. He created different roles for us within families and somehow, even by earlier biblical times, those roles became known as more and less important and they stretched to become meaningful in society as a whole.

Enter the Proverbs 31 woman. I’ve always liked her, but people use her as an example for something she’s not. She’s not timid or meek. She’s not stuck in a box. She’s certainly not less important. She’s feisty and has gumption. She’s a shrewd businesswoman, she works out, and she trusts her gut. My favorite part about this passage though, is that it says absolutely nothing about how good she is at the things she does.

We women love to both judge and compare ourselves to each other, partly out of nature and mostly out of nurture. Society has fueled in us the need to be better than our lady friends. You know who is the worst at this? Type-A people..

My husband recently said to me “You can’t be the best at everything you know.” While rationally I know this to be true, I let it hurt my feelings and you know what it was about? Rice Crispy Treats. Freaking RICE CRISPY TREATS. Ugh, God has so much work to do on me.

Proverbs 31 is filled with tons of badass things that this lady is and does, but says nothing about her skill level. Maybe she rose while it was still night with bedhead and horrific morning breath and went straight for the coffee because she was sooo not a morning person. Maybe all of the coverings and linens she sewed came out with crooked seams. Maybe her charity didn’t serve as many homeless people as the woman next door’s did. It says she GIVES food to her household and maidens, but maybe the Proverbs 31 woman ordered takeout because she was a terrible cook. MAYBE after all of that rising and sewing and feeding and field-buying she was exhausted and wound down with a bubble bath and a glass of wine… sheepskin of wine? You get the point.

She still lived her life like a boss. She was confident in what she did and delighted in serving her family. Even if she wasn’t the best, her husband was proud to be standing at her side and her children ADORED her.

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That’s all we really can do. Be the best us we know how to be and don’t sweat the rest. As a new mom, I’m learning that this is so important to remember. I’ve already crossed craftiness and staying underwhelmed off the list of things I’m good at, and I can assure you that there are more things on that list than the other one. But you know what I am awesome at? Loving that little guy so much that it hurts. He and Bryan make me want to be better for our family. My job is to keep him alive, lead him toward Christ, and love him, and as long as I am doing those things, even if I’m not the best at it, then I’m a Proverbs 31 woman too.

Love, Alex

Mom.

Oh heeeeeey. Nice to see you again. I kind dropped off th face of the earth there for a bit huh? Well, allow me to show you why:

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I mean.

So, all that talk about being pregnant and all of the misery and frustration finally paid off and I got THIS ADORABLE CREATURE.

But really though? I’ve never been so tired in my life. I mean he’s worth it an all, but for real. so much not sleep.

The other day he slept AT NIGHT for 4 straight hours, which as you can imagine I was super excited about, until I realized that it meant that 4 is the most consecutive hours I have slept in almost a month as well. Then I was kind of sad.

I had all of the big feelings and raging hormones that you can imagine I had (ok fine. HAVE), and I will of course share those with you all in detail as if you really wanted to know about my ugly-crying sessions.

For now though, I will leave you with these pictures. Mostly because I figured the internet was running short of photos of people’s children.

My new favorite thing ever. Unless I have crap to do, then I'm just like "stop crying and sleep kid. Mommy has to wash your clothes and eat her lunch."

My new favorite thing ever. Unless I have crap to do, then I’m just like “stop crying and sleep kid. Mommy has to wash your clothes and eat her lunch.”

Is this not the sexiest thing you've ever seen in your entire life? OK, I could understand if not. but for me? Oh man.

Is this not the sexiest thing you’ve ever seen in your entire life? OK, I could understand if not. but for me? Oh man.

First bath! This is his favorite part. The part where he gets out of the bathtub and is wrapped in a towel and held after such a traumatic experience.

First bath! This is his favorite part. The part where he gets out of the bathtub and is wrapped in a towel and held after such a traumatic experience.

As you could imagine, Phoebe is ready for the new puppy to go back to his house.

As you could imagine, Phoebe is ready for the new puppy to go back to his house.

Grady and his new BFF Vaun. My friend Sarah and I were only 4 days apart our entire pregnancies and then our kids are now like a couple of weeks apart! (I was early, she was late)

Grady and his new BFF Vaun. My friend Sarah and I were only 4 days apart our entire pregnancies and then our kids are now like a couple of weeks apart! (I was early, she was late)

Indoctrinating him into our love of superheros early on. Raise a child up in the way that he should and whatnot.

Indoctrinating him into our love of superheros early on. Raise a child up in the way that he should go and whatnot.

Oh wait how did this get in here? Ok fine. I just had to prove that a) we actually did something on New Years Eve sans our child (Even if we were home by 11), and b) brag on my first post-baby drink! It was delicious if you were wondering.

Oh wait how did this get in here? Ok fine. I just had to prove that a) we actually did something on New Years Eve sans our child (Even if we were home by 11), and b) brag on my first post-baby drink! It was delicious if you were wondering.

I’m all kinds of pent-up with writing tension, so look forward to my verbal vomit in the coming weeks :).

Love, Alex

What We’re Wearing Wednesday…with Friends! (Volume 7)

What We're Wearing Wednesday

Last night, we had a staff meeting and editing party for the S&B Crew complete with me screwing up dinner and having to order pizza (don’t worry, I managed not to cry this time) and me getting bored with the editing part and going to do my own thing after the meeting.

We’ve been super busy with shoots lately, which is a huge blessing! We’re loving getting to do lots of shoots every week and getting to work with our team…hence the editing party. I also forced asked them nicely to model for my weekly non-fashion post. They’re pretty stylish if you ask me.

Bryan


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Jacket: Aigle|Pants: Express (surprise surprise)

Brenna


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I happen to know that she got that top at a thrift shop.

brenna accessories

Who doesn’t need a good state reppin’ necklace? She wears more jewelry each day than I wear all week probably…and rocks it!

brenna shoes

Shoes: Soda (from Tilly’s)

Susie


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Susie has been wearing new jeans lately (these included), and I told her that they made her look thin and her butt look good. She replied “I know! I got all excited when I tried them on and realized I’m not as fat as I thought I was!” No ma’am, you are not.

susie accessories

I have a little scarf envy over this thing. You do not need another scarf Alex, you do not.

susie shoes

She called these her fake Sperrys…then quickly changed it to ferrys.

Alex


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I’m pretty sure I’ve worn this shirt for WWWW before, but whatever, man. I can’t be buying a whole new wardrobe for a few months of my life.

Top: Old Navy Maternity|Skinny Yoga Pants(MY NEW BEST FRIENDS): Target Maternity

alex shoes

We all know how much I love my Big Buddha bow flats. Well, my friend Arden found these on sale in Alabama and snagged them for me! How adorable are these?! The box should have com with built-in lights so when I opened it, the angelic “AAAAH” I heard in my head would have been complete.

Love, Alex

 

What We’re Wearing Wednesday (Volume 6)

What We're Wearing Wednesday

Well, as I stated earlier today, things are a little busy around the Fittin Household today. However, I have had these photos on hand for a few days now and wanted to share what this preggo has been wearing lately. I usually wouldn’t be so excited, except that it’s finally getting cooler which means I can wear my new gear! I think I actually look better in long sleeved maternity clothes, but maybe I’m just not tired of them yet.

Hmmm.

Bryan


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The jeans are Express. Again. Listen, he likes Express clothes and jeans especially and uses award gift cards from work to buy them. So THAT’S why.

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I really like these shoes when he wears them. They go with a lot and especially Razorback stuff. Duh.

 

Alex


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The jeans are Old Navy (as always) and the top is Motherhood. I have a thing with stripes. Love ’em. Can’t get enough of them. Being that I am normally pretty hippy, I know horizontal stripes aren’t my friends, but I just can’t help myself!

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Brown flats from Target. I have had these for like 2 years and STILL haven’t broken them in. They’re so cute but for real, my feet cry a little when my brain sees them and says “Ooooh! I’ve wear these today!”

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This was one of those mall kiosk finds by my mom. She knows I love me some Burberry and have no qualms with a good knock-off and bought it for me for Christmas. THANKS MOM!

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These earrings are cute and go with soooo much but man, they hurt after 8 hours. One of these days I will learn not to buy heavy earrings.

 

Love, Alex

Texas and Bryan and Bears, Oh My!

So as my last Hoorah before the baby comes, we decided to surprise Bryan’s bestie (read: boyfriend) Gerardo and drive down to Texas to spend a couple of days with him and his girlfriend Charolette (Who I really like, thankfully. Doesn’t it suck when you’re sort of stuck hanging out with someone who annoys you because of all of the relational connections? Totally not the case with Charolette). I plan to post some more photos and quips about our trip and adventures there, but for now I figured I’d leave you with the two most exciting animal encounters we had on the trip.

Alex petting zebra

First of all, I GOT TO PET A ZEBRA AT THE TEXAS STATE FAIR! Don’t even start with me about how that’s not a big deal. It so is.  I’ve never pet one before and it was like I could feel the cool stripe factor through their hair. Please horse, you have nothing on baby zebra.

Grady and zebra

Charolette took this picture and said it was of Grady and the zebra. So #LilFit, even though you’re already betrothed to bears as your favorite animal, let it be known that you were up close and personal with a zebra first.

Barnaby waving

An admittedly bigger deal, though, was this. We got to go to a wildlife refuge called Sharkarosa in Pilot Pointe and they had a super cool feature where you could EAT WITH BEARS. Seriously, they have a pizza place right next to the bear den (Called Bears’ Den, no less. Free tip: the service there was not great, and Charolotte had to get us our drinks from a server inside and then no one ever came to give us our food or a check for the drinks after about 45 minutes of sitting there, so we got to see the bears for free!) and they do shows every few hours where they bring the bears to a table and feed them avocados literally like 2 yards away from you. Bryan, as you could imagine, was outside his mind excited. This was the boy bear, Barnaby, doing a trick for his trainer (and for a peppermint-so cute!).

Barnaby waving

I’m sure Bryan would want to imagine that Barnaby was waving at him in this photo, but no, more tricks for peppermints. I’m seriously not kidding though, this was maybe a yard from the bear.

Love, Alex